March Break, a Sad Good Bye and a life lesson about Expectations

March Break, a Sad Good Bye and a life lesson about expectations, the week that was week 45 for the Carr’s hits the blog-o-sphere

---

March Break
We have an extended family that is always willing to help with the girls when it comes to sitting or even over night stays. I like to think that part of the reason they are always so willing to help is that the girls are cute, always funny and in general, they don’t eat too much, but I may be forgetting that they are also so well behaved when they are with others. This week for March break, our great family, namely Oma and Opa invited the girls to their house for the annual “Oma Boot Camp”. This year it was even a little more timely, because of the long list of work we need to get done on the house. Thanks to Oma for taking on that responsibility, and also thanks for giving us the added bonus of time alone for reconnecting. Nathalie and I flashed back to pre-kids early married life and only had to worry about remembering to feed the dog! The good news, we didn’t forget once.

Sad Goodbye
For the last 7 years, besides us, and the great teachers at the girl’s school, the one consistent caregiver in our girl’s lives has been Karen. It was Karen, our babysitter that removed many of the girl’s wiggly teeth and tended to the skinned knees received at school, after getting off the bus and it was Karen that had to deal with little kid drama when someone said something about someone else. As simple as hug when they where sad or a pat on the shoulder when they did something good, it has been Karen that has made a difference in the girls life, before and after school.

We have grown to be good friends with her and her husband and have watched her children move from their teens to responsible adults. In fact, Nathalie gave their daughter a job 5 years ago that she has been able to turn into a career by moving up in the company, long after Nathalie left. Their son was our hired painter when we moved into our new house and when the workload turned into a much bigger job then any of us thought, it was Karen and her husband that jumped in and spent many evenings here helping us get ready to move in. True friends for sure!

I titled this piece a “sad goodbye” because today I helped them load the last bit of their stuff into the moving truck that was pointed west to their new house in Milton. With this move comes our need to change to a new sitter for the girls and that makes it a very sad goodbye, because the girls have grown so much in this time with Karen in our lives. We wish them all the best and although a simple thank you will never equate to the love and caring they have give to us and our family over these years, the thanks we do give is drenched in respect and admiration and a commitment to stay in touch.

Expectations
Dad type speech alert! If you are not in the mood, or perhaps not ready to hear a life lesson wrapped in one of those “What does that mean” story, you may want to skip to the next section. You see, I have always had an issue with expectations and this week, I think I finally nailed down one of the causes, thanks to Nathalie pointing it out to me. I don’t verbalize things that I expect to happen enough. I am sure that this is the reason why many people are disappointed when things don’t work out the way they wanted. They blame others for not doing things a certain way or complain out loud that things didn’t work out, but yet they probably, like me never told the parties involved, what it is that they expected before hand. I think next week, I am going to try much harder at telling people what it is that I expect to happen before it happens, and see if it helps.

In closing

You would think that in the girl’s absence this week, the comedy well of “little girl quotes” would be bone dry but it is NOT. Just a few hours after I posted last weeks’ blog and after some much needed sleep, the whole family had to get up early Saturday morning, to take a new family picture. When you combine, an earlier then normal wake up call, and the stress of 4 people trying to get ready under time constraints, there is bound to be a little drama. Surprisingly though, it was well orchestrated largely because Nathalie told me that the pictures where at 9:20AM when they where actually scheduled for 9:50. I think in the end, that 30-minute breathing room was the difference!

Now to the drama! Jordyn, not a big fan of the morning on good days, was not in the mood to make too much of an effort getting dressed, so when Nathalie told her that the white tights that she picked did not work and that she needed to find black ones, her response was a very quick “I don’t have any”. Overhearing this and knowing that she didn’t even look, Julia pipes in with a “you have some in your top drawer, Jordyn”. This information from anyone, especially her little sister, was not well received so Jordyn protested loudly “NO I DON’T”.

Meanwhile, as Jordyn is continuing to complain, Julia walks to Jordyn’s drawer, opens it up, grabs a pair of black tights, and runs up to her and while waving them in her face, proudly says “Don’t want to tell you so, BUT”. That was it. “BUT”. I have to remember that! Sometimes it is not what you say, or how you say it, but what you don’t say that makes all the difference in the world.

Saying “Have a great and safe week, and thanks for reading” works for me!
Jim

---